Thursday, December 30, 2010
Reason #6 Why You Should Go On A Date With Me, Gabriele Anderson
Reason #6: I respect women. You can be sure of this because my sister goes to Mt Holyoke, and I've never once tried to visit her for the weekend, "just because."
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Reasons #4 And #5 Why You Should Go On A Date With Me, Gabriele Anderson
Reason #4: I like good modern fiction. Ian McEwan, Zadie Smith, Salman Rushdie, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Tim O'Brien (although that The Things They Carried isn't really fictional is a legitimate point), Kurt Vonnegut, David Foster Wallace (though I admittedly haven't made it through Infinite Jest yet--I twice started it and realized it was going to make me flunk out of school or lose my job--and I think his non-fiction is overrated), Milan Kundera, Dave Eggers, and Thomas Pynchon are some of my favorite authors. But I've got some guilty pleasures, too: Harry Potter, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, lesser-known young adult author William J. Brooke's Teller of Tales, and several trashy fantasy series (David Eddings's Belgariad being chief among them).
Reason #5: Dating me would be a good ego boost. Not in the "you-should-date-me-because-I'm-so-awesome-you-would-be-happy-just-to-get-to-spend-time-with-me" sense, but rather in the "you-should-date-me-because-wow-will-it-feel-good-to-have-at-least-one-person-around-who-isn't-a-massive-overachiever" sense. I mean, c'mon, you run for Team USA Minnesota. As best I can tell from their bios, between them your teammates have earned at least 46 NCAA All-American honors, have represented Team USA in international competitions at least 35 times (24 of them in World Championship events), won 21 national championships at levels ranging from high school to professional, have made 3 USA Outdoor Track World Championship teams, won the USA Road Circuit 2 times, and been named USATF Long Distance Runner of the Year twice. Also, one of them has a graduate degree. Rather than having to live up to these high standards all the time, wouldn't it be nice to date a guy who knows you're a higher-achiever than him at, well, pretty much everything? There's just no pressure there.
Reason #5: Dating me would be a good ego boost. Not in the "you-should-date-me-because-I'm-so-awesome-you-would-be-happy-just-to-get-to-spend-time-with-me" sense, but rather in the "you-should-date-me-because-wow-will-it-feel-good-to-have-at-least-one-person-around-who-isn't-a-massive-overachiever" sense. I mean, c'mon, you run for Team USA Minnesota. As best I can tell from their bios, between them your teammates have earned at least 46 NCAA All-American honors, have represented Team USA in international competitions at least 35 times (24 of them in World Championship events), won 21 national championships at levels ranging from high school to professional, have made 3 USA Outdoor Track World Championship teams, won the USA Road Circuit 2 times, and been named USATF Long Distance Runner of the Year twice. Also, one of them has a graduate degree. Rather than having to live up to these high standards all the time, wouldn't it be nice to date a guy who knows you're a higher-achiever than him at, well, pretty much everything? There's just no pressure there.
Reasons #1-3 Why You Should Go On A Date With Me, Gabrielle Anderson
Reason #1: We have so much in common: you run (professionally), and I run (decidedly not professionally). You were an English and Political Science major in undergrad, and I was an English major and really enjoy reading Nate Silver's blog. You're from Minnesota, and I've been there twice (three times if you count a several-hour airport layover!). We're basically doppelgangers.
Reason #2: I have a beard. It's a pretty good look. I'll admit that it gets a little out of control sometimes, but I would definitely trim it more regularly if you asked.
Reason #3: I'm a pretty good cook. Not a great one (my knife skills need some work, and I'm a little timid to experiment with non-Mexican ethnic foods), but a pretty good one. Last night I made a mean whole wheat pasta caprese salad topped with a lemon and olive oil sauce and grated parmigiano reggiano, and one of my go-tos is this eggplant pizza where the eggplant isn't a topping but replaces the bread-dough pizza base (I just blew your mind, didn't I?). They're both pretty yummy about 85-90% of the time.
Reason #2: I have a beard. It's a pretty good look. I'll admit that it gets a little out of control sometimes, but I would definitely trim it more regularly if you asked.
Reason #3: I'm a pretty good cook. Not a great one (my knife skills need some work, and I'm a little timid to experiment with non-Mexican ethnic foods), but a pretty good one. Last night I made a mean whole wheat pasta caprese salad topped with a lemon and olive oil sauce and grated parmigiano reggiano, and one of my go-tos is this eggplant pizza where the eggplant isn't a topping but replaces the bread-dough pizza base (I just blew your mind, didn't I?). They're both pretty yummy about 85-90% of the time.
Professional Runner Gabriele Anderson: Will You Go On A Date With Me?
Dear Gabriele Anderson,
You don't know me (in fact, we've never even met in person), so you're probably not aware that I have a pretty massive crush on you. You're cute, good at what you do (read: running super-fast), and, from interviews I've seen, seem like a young woman who, if you will pardon the expression, has her shit together.
While you almost certainly aren't aware of my crush on you, you may be aware that viral romantic interactions are sort of in right now (see this link for details). As such, I've decided to capitalize on this trend, and ask you out, but in the wussiest way possible: by letting the internet do it for me.
So, umm, Gabriele Anderson, will you, uhh, like, go on a date with me?
If you see this and are against it or on the fence, well, I definitely understand that. After all, the internet is full of some pretty bizarre dudes hiding behind faceless user names, so how can you know I'm not a weirdo--some kind of con artist, a serial killer, or (worst of all) an amateur mime? However, in order to assuage your fears and prove to you that I am not, in fact, any of those things (or any kind of weirdo other than the kind that attempts to ask you out virally), and am instead the kind of person you would want to go on a date with, I intend to use this space to, over the next few days, tell you why you should go out with me. So stay tuned, and hopefully be convinced.
Best regards,
A Dude You Should Date
You don't know me (in fact, we've never even met in person), so you're probably not aware that I have a pretty massive crush on you. You're cute, good at what you do (read: running super-fast), and, from interviews I've seen, seem like a young woman who, if you will pardon the expression, has her shit together.
While you almost certainly aren't aware of my crush on you, you may be aware that viral romantic interactions are sort of in right now (see this link for details). As such, I've decided to capitalize on this trend, and ask you out, but in the wussiest way possible: by letting the internet do it for me.
So, umm, Gabriele Anderson, will you, uhh, like, go on a date with me?
If you see this and are against it or on the fence, well, I definitely understand that. After all, the internet is full of some pretty bizarre dudes hiding behind faceless user names, so how can you know I'm not a weirdo--some kind of con artist, a serial killer, or (worst of all) an amateur mime? However, in order to assuage your fears and prove to you that I am not, in fact, any of those things (or any kind of weirdo other than the kind that attempts to ask you out virally), and am instead the kind of person you would want to go on a date with, I intend to use this space to, over the next few days, tell you why you should go out with me. So stay tuned, and hopefully be convinced.
Best regards,
A Dude You Should Date
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